Latest on Bloody Mel

Someone I consider highly reliable, close to Mel Gibson, swears his breakup with his wife of 29 years had nothing to do with rumored affairs and big (or perhaps little) problems in the sack. "It's all about Mel's bizarre, unnatural preoccupation with gore," my source told me, "He keeps pacing, mumbling, 'Where am I ever going to get enough real blood for my next movie? How am I going to get that many donors?' It made Robyn Gibson realize what a sicko pup Mel really is. She finally got fed up and bolted the farm." Hollywood insiders claim Gibson, 53, based his new historical flick around an incident taking place in Eighteenth-Century Japan--the mass crucifixion of 3,000 Japanese Christians by the War Lord Tokugawa Iyasu. The 130 million-dollar project, "Shogun Bloodbath" is rumored to outdo even the ultra-violent excesses of Mel's previous works.

A still shot from the early rushes of Mel Gibson's next blockbuster, "Shogun Bloodbath".

Studio exec Marvin Greenbladder was nothing but enthusiastic about the Academy Award winner and convicted drunk driver's latest. "Mel's new film will make Apocalypto look like freakin' Charley and the Chocolate Factory and The Passion of Christ seem like Sponge Bob Squarepants in the Holy Land", he gushed. "He's already ordered a dozen 55-gallon drums full of fresh pig entrails for the shoot. Any idea how much pig entrails cost these days? Even with the freakin' Swine Flu scare, they're still not easy to get."

"When it comes to onscreen flowing blood, Mel is pulling out all the stops this time" he told me over coffee, later on. "Mel is to blood what Hitchcock was to suspense or Francis Ford Coppolla was to Italians."

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